The Trapeze Swinger
by LostInTranslation764
Summary: Macy Misa was five when she decided that she wants to be a Trapeze Swinger. Nick/Macy Written for the Pure Horace Mantis Community Challenge


_I decided to write a one-shot for the __Pure Horace Mantis Community Challenge. So, here it is. It's a bit long and I would recommend listening to 'The Trapeze Swinger' by Iron&Wine because the story was inspired by that song and one of the quotes __**suburbs **__has provided._

_A shout-out to __**suburb **__because she came up with the idea for this challenge and because the quote she provided gave me the idea for this story._

_And, h__ere is the story. Enjoy!  
_

* * *

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

* * *

_The Trapeze Swinger_

"_True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked." _- Erich Segal

_**And please remember me as in the dream  
we had as rug-burned babies  
among the fallen trees and fast asleep  
beside the lions and the ladies  
that called you what you like and even might  
give a gift for your behavior:  
a fleeting chance to see a trapeze-  
swinger high as any savior.**_

_(Iron&Wine 'The Trapeze Swinger')_

¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤¸,ø

I.

Macy Misa was five when she decided that she wants to be a Trapeze Swinger.

The circus was in town and her daddy took her to see the show. The circus was a dream come true for little Macy: all the different, mesmerizing colors, the fascinating sounds, the clowns, the animals, cotton candy – everything was wonderful. But more than anything else Macy loved the Trapeze Swingers. One glance at the flying people and Macy had lost her little heart to the Trapeze Swingers. She had never seen anything that beautiful before: they were flying without wings… flying without falling… they were completely free.

And that was the moment five year old Macy knew, she wanted to become a Trapeze Swinger.

It became a routine for her daddy and Macy to visit the circus whenever a circus was in town and it became a routine for her daddy and her to dream about the ability to fly without wings.

---------------

II.

Macy was eight when her world crumbled down.

It was a day of blue skies edged in grey from the lingering storm. The docks no longer had the strong fish-gut smell that would assault one's senses, but the winter sea and the scent of salt was in the air… though that would not last long since the fishermen would soon return home from the ocean with their new piles of fishes - and it was that smell that would bring tears in her eyes whenever she looked back to yesterdays. Her daddy stood on the docks, his hands in his pockets and his eyes to the horizon, pensive and far away. She must say that at the time she was not paying too much attention to her father. She was still young and naive. To a child, the moods of parents are only interesting if they are angry with you or willing to give you something. At the moment, all she could think about was how fascinating the docks were, how pretty the boats with their paper sails were, and how glorious the ocean stretched. She watched fascinated at the flight of sea gulls in the sky, their squawking cries did not deter her from seeing their beauty and their freedom. They reminded her of the Trapeze Swingers she desperately wanted to become. She did not mind the slipperiness of the filthy wood beneath her feet.

"Daddy, can we go eat?"

Daddy was silent. That's what made her look at him, what made her study him and remember how he had looked that day, before he collapsed her world. His back was straight. His dark hair was cut short, his green eyes searching the sea for answers an eight year old child could never give him. A tailored suit adorned his tall figure and made him stand out even more than his hair and his height.

The dock rocked beneath her feet as the wind blew by like a wave from the sea and his words knocked her down, succeeding where the wind failed. Her daddy had always been straight forward.

"Macy," his soft voice echoed still in her dreams, "I have cancer, the doctor says that I will die in two months, four if I'm lucky."

She blinked. She thought at first he was joking! She didn't know whether he expected her to laugh, but when Macy looked up at his tears falling like tiny crystals in the emerging sun, she knew. She stood there silent, in indecision. At the time she did not know what cancer meant, the disease that would become her enemy, but she had already learned the general meaning of death even though she had never concerned herself with it, at that age she still believed in eternity and the god-hood of parents.

"Will you be an angel then?" She finally asked in a small voice because her daddy wouldn't leave his only daughter behind. Daddy wouldn't be cruel like that.

Daddy looked startled for a moment at her naive question, at her desperate attempt to hold on to the reality Macy had taken for granted for over eight years of her short life. But then he nodded and smiled at her. She had always loved his smiles.

"Of course! I would never miss the chance to see my little Macy flying through the air." His gentle hands were grazing her long dark hair. "You are my little Trapeze Swinger."

Two months later, Macy's father died.

She still dreamt about that day:

_Leav__e me in the dark with you, Daddy. I don't want to leave your side._

_I sat on the hard bench. I felt no longer earthed__ with my short legs dangling from the bench… just lost. I did not remember where my dreams began and my world ended._

_It was an empty chapel, a tapestry of white with golden crosses._

_All the others stood and walked over to view the sleeping face of the man we all loved._

_I stood up and walked to the casket to see your face for the last time, for one last memory to be held with you so close, and yet so far. _

_I wanted to tell you how much __I have matured and that I braided my hair myself. I wanted to tell you that Mama was very sad and couldn't stop crying. I wanted to tell you that I miss you already and bury my face in your chest. But most importantly, I wanted to say hello instead of goodbye._

_One step…_

_Daddy'__s sleeping._

_One glance…_

_Wake __up!_

_I reached out…_

_You are so peaceful._

_Laying down the single blossom__…_

_You are far away from the pain now, no one can harm you._

_I leaned forward…_

_All my heart on that small flower._

_Kissing your cheek…_

_All my dreams to be__ buried in sleep with you, Daddy._

_"I love you, Daddy__."_

_Can I sleep in your coffin with you? Can I give you the warmth you no longer have on those cold cheeks? Why can't I wake you from your dreams? Why can't I join you in your sleep?_

_"Macy__, let's go."_

_I could've stood there for eternity, but the firm hand on my shoulder __turned me away. I grasped Mama´s hand, walking in silence out the door, leaving Daddy behind. He had no need to drift away, I was already too far to see his face. I had already laid down my heart with his within that coffin._

_Goodbye, Daddy._

Macy was eight when she realized that she would never become a Trapeze Swinger.

----------------

III.

Macy Misa was fifteen when she fell in love.

Macy wasn't the girl to fall in love easily. Yes, she liked to obsess over things… like her sports or JONAS, but she wasn't the type of girl to run after boys and drool over them. She was Macy Misa, the star athlete of Horace Mantis Academy.

But everything changed when THEY enrolled in her school. JONAS her favorite band going to school with her… a dream come true for Macy. At first she stalked them like every other girl (_besides Stella, of course_) and tried to get as near as possible to them. Of course, she fainted whenever she was near one of the Lucas brothers or she repeatedly hurt them with one of her many sports equipments but in the long run, Macy realized that THEY are not JONAS but just Kevin, Joe and Nick.

So, somehow – and Macy honestly didn't know how or why – everything changed. Macy learned to control her breathing around the Lucas brothers and she even succeeded in not hurting them with her various sport equipments (_at least, she doesn't hurt them as often as she used to_). She even managed to form a friendship with the brothers. Macy knew that this should make her happy but along the way of becoming friends with the Lucas brothers, she also fell in love. Macy hadn't planned to fall in love and especially not with Nick Lucas. She wasn't even able to explain why she had fallen in love with him - however she didn't actually care for the reasons. Macy realized that being in love with Nick felt exactly like the first time she had been at the circus with her Daddy. She felt happy and excited and every color seemed much more intensive and she felt like flying without wings.

Macy probably would have been happy with just being able to experience this feeling of love without telling anyone (_especially not Nick_) but of course Stella found out. Macy didn't know how, although Stella was an expert when it came to love and relationships. And it felt really good to talk with Stella about the love she was feeling, because Stella always managed to make her feel so much better. Deep down, Macy wished that she could keep Stella with her forever because with Stella by her side everything was so much better and brighter.

Of course Stella wouldn't be Stella if she wouldn't try to interfere.

"You have to tell him." Stella said while Macy tried to put her books into her locker. Slamming her locker shut Macy turned towards Stella and asked, "Why?" She didn't even pretend not to know about what Stella was talking.

Stella sighed because she knew that Macy really didn't understand why it was necessary to admit her feeling to the youngest Lucas brother.

Stella smiled at her friend, "Because you will feel much better after your admission and I'm sure that Nick likes you too." The blonde took her petite friend's hand, pulling her towards the music room before Macy could even attempt to say something.

"C'mon, I know that Nick is in the music room trying to work on a song and – "

"But-" Macy began to protest although she knew that one Stella was on a roll nothing could stop her – or maybe something could.

"Ouch, Stella!" Macy exclaimed as she bumped into Stella shoulder. "Why don't you move?" The brunette asked and stepped from behind her friend to peer into the open music room.

"Oh…" Macy spoke.

There in the music room was Nick – and a girl. A really beautiful girl with wonderful light-brown hair and pretty blue eyes- She was smiling… Nick was _smiling_. And then he bent down slightly and pressed a light kiss on the girl's lips. The girl smiled beautifully and Nick grinned.

"Oh…" Macy said again and Stella tore her eyes away from Nick and his girlfriend to look at her friend.

"Mace…" She began but stopped when Macy touched her arm and pulled her away from the room.

"Let's go to the cafeteria and grab something to eat. I'm starving, Stell." Macy smiled at Stella. Said girl watched her friend and grabbed her friend's hand, squeezing it slightly. There was nothing more to do.

Macy Misa was fifteen when she realized that she wasn't meant to fall in love.

_**Please, remember me  
My misery  
And how it lost me all I wanted  
Those dogs that love the rain  
And chasing trains  
The colored birds above there running  
In circles round the well  
And where it spells  
On the wall behind St. Peter's  
So bright with cinder gray  
And spray paint  
'Who the hell can see forever?'**_

---------------

IV.

Macy was sixteen when she tried to fly for the first time.

It was the 21st March… the first day of spring… a Monday… and Macy hated this day. Every year for 8 years it was the same. Her mother would be up already waiting for her with a big breakfast and greeting her cheerily.

There was nothing cheery about this day and Macy just wanted to stay in her bed, cry and pretend that everything was alright but she didn't. Instead – just like every year, Macy put a big smile on her face and greeted her mother a cheery _'Good Morning!'_.

She drove to school with a smile, she entered the halls of Horace Mantis Academy with a smile, she even managed to avoid Stella (_because Stella could see right through her_) with a smile on her face and after a while Macy could pretend not to feel so hollow.

Even when she ate lunch with Stella, Kevin, Joe, Nick and Nick's girlfriend Amy, Macy kept smiling (_even though she knew that Stella was shooting worried glances at her every two seconds_). Without any appetite she picked at her salad with her fork while listening to the conversation and trying to avoid Stella's worried eyes.

"Oh, you have to hear the new song Nick has written," Amy spoke melodically and Macy asked herself why her voice couldn't be as nice as hers.

"He has written it just for me." The blue-eyed girl gushed and Macy could see Stella rolling her eyes before giving her another worried look. But Macy kept on smiling.

"_Fly with me_… isn't that a wonderful title-"

"Macy?"

Macy turned her head towards Stella who was now openly watching her with concern in her eyes and Macy realized that she was not sitting on her chair anymore and that the chair was lying on the floor. Everybody on the table was looking at her.

"I…" Macy began, "I forgot that I need to speak to Mr. Johnson." She mumbled and without looking at any of her friends, Macy ran out of the cafeteria.

She ran out of the school towards the soccer-field… she just wanted to be away from everything. She ran until she reached the field and stopped in the middle of it. Resting her hands on her knees, Macy crouched down and took deep breaths.

'_Idiot… idiot… idiot… idiot!', _she thought and let herself fall on her knees. Why did she do that? Why couldn't she have stayed and continued to smile and be happy. Now, her friends were thinking of her as freak and Stella is probably already looking for her. She should return to the school.

Standing up from her crouched-position, the brown-haired girl raised her head towards the sky and felt a raindrop falling on her right cheek. Before Macy could do anything the rain was falling hard and fast.

This was it… her time to fly.

Macy closed her eyes, turned her face to the sky from where the rain was pounding on her face.

She opened her arms wide…

Maybe this would help and she wouldn't feel so hallow anymore.

Maybe she could feel like flying again.

Maybe she would be able to feel anything at all.

¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤¸,ø¤

Immediately after Macy had run out of the cafeteria, Stella leapt from her chair.

"I have to follow her and find her," she mumbled and smiled when Kevin, Joe and Nick stood up as well.

Joe gently touched her arm, "We'll help you to find her." The middle Lucas brother could see that his best-friend was extremely worried and he had to admit that he was pretty worried himself. He had never seen Macy act like that before. Even he could see that something was wrong with their friend.

"What is her problem anyway?" Amy asked irritated, looking at Stella.

Stella frowned angrily, but ignored her and turned toward the Lucas brothers, "Let's just try to find her."

The boys nodded and followed Stella out of the cafeteria.

¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤¸,ø¤

Stella had ordered Nick to look for Macy outside the school-building. He cursed his luck, because just when he had stepped outside, it had begun to rain.

He was soaking wet and grumpy when he reached the soccer-field. He blinked and stood still when he seemed to see a figure in the center of the field. Nick walked closer to the figure through the soccer-field… and the next thing he saw would be embedded into his memory forever. It was so glorious, spectacular, something to be found in water-color paintings. There on the centre of the soccer-field, surrounded by nothing but grass and with rain drops falling at her frame softly, stood Macy.

Her chocolate-brown eyes were closed tight, her arms held out to her sides as she spun around incessantly, like a helicopter, on pointed, bare toes. Her school-blazer was lying on the ground. Her mouth was wide open and her eyes tightly shut. Her brown locks of hair whirled about her tiny frame like wet, spiral staircases.

At that moment, all Nick could think was that she couldn't possibly be an earthly creature and how beautiful she looked. His second thought was how much rain suited her… it was a weird thought but Nick had never seen a person who looked so wonderful in the rain.

Before he knew what he was doing he was by her side. Her eyes were still shut and she had not noticed him. Gently he touched one of her whirling arms and Macy stopped abruptly and opened her eyes. The youngest Lucas brother was shocked to see that tears were glistering in her eyes.

"I tried to fly," she whispered before he could say anything.

Nick realized that he had never seen Macy so sad and broken. Macy has always been sunbeams, laughter, color and rainbows but now it seemed as if she would never smile again. Nick couldn't imagine Macy without her smile… it just wasn't meant to be.

"Did you succeed?" He asked although he didn't really understand what she meant and before she even opened her mouth to say something, he already knew the answer. Her eyes said it all.

"No…" Macy croaked out brokenly.

The curly-haired boy didn't know what he should say, so he pulled her tiny frame into his arms. She buried her head into his chest and although he was soaking wet, Nick could feel her tears wetting his shirt. They felt hot on his shirt – a strange contrast to the cold raindrops that kept falling onto them. He let her sob and cry and tried to understand what was happening and all the while he was hoping that she wasn't broke beyond repair.

Macy was sixteen when she realized that she couldn't fly.

_**And please remember me, seldomly  
in the car behind the carnival  
my hand between your knees, you turn from me  
and said the trapeze act was wonderful  
but never meant to last, the clowns that passed  
saw me just come up with anger  
when it filled the circus dogs, the parking lot  
had an element of danger.**_

---------------------

V.

Macy was sixteen when she tried to let go.

There were days when Macy wanted to stop pretending that everything was alright. She wanted to hate her mother for always trying her best to make her happy, she wanted to hate Stella for always trying to understand her, she wanted to hate Kevin and Joe for making her laugh and feel appreciated and she wanted to hate Nick for not seeing how much she loves him. She wanted to throw a temper tantrum… she wanted to feel angry… she wanted to cry. In those moments of weakness, Macy hated herself the most, because she could never hate her mother or Stella or Joe or Kevin… or Nick.

It had been three weeks since her incident (_that's how she refers to her moment of weakness)_ with Nick. Three weeks since she had talked with Stella and assured her that everything was alright (_and three weeks since Stella had seen through her pathetic lie) _and it had been three weeks since Macy had seen Nick. She had managed to avoid Nick in these three weeks. Not that it had been that difficult, because it seemed as if Nick had also been trying to avoid her.

"Macy, have you been listening to me?" Macy heard her friend Stella asking her as the blonde leaned against the lockers.

The petite brunette was rescued from answering when two third of JONAS appeared from behind her.

"Hey Stella, Macy," Joe greeted.

"What a wonderful day we have today," Kevin said, smiling at Stella and Macy.

"Oh yeah, really wonderful," Joe answered sarcastically. "I don't know how you can be so cheerful when we have an Algebra-exam later today."

"We have an Algebra-exam today?" Kevin asked the cheerful smile completely erased from his face. "Why didn't you tell me that sooner?

"I did!" Joe protested. "But you were too busy daydreaming about an otter with a violin."

"It was an otter with a trumpet and just so you know, the otter would have told me about the Algebra-exam," the oldest Lucas brother spoke while poking his younger brother on his chest.

"Could you please end this pointless conversation?" Stella's irritated voice could be heard.

"Yes m'am!" Both Lucas brothers said at the same time and Macy couldn't stop the smile that appeared on her lips. Her friends would always find a way to make her smile.

"Where is Nick?" The blonde asked while trying to adjust Joe's tie correctly. "Joe, I honestly don't know how you mange to destroy all of my perfect outfits. It's not that difficult to put on a tie correctly."

Before Joe could begin to complain back to Stella, Kevin decided to answer Stella's question. "Nick wanted to be left alone," the curly-haired boy explained. "He broke up with Amy yesterday." He added.

Stella stopped her fumbling with Joe's tie, "He did what?" She almost screeched and shot a small, discrete glance at Macy.

"He broke up with Amy," Joe repeated happy that Stella had moved from his 'imperfect' outfit to something else.

"He broke up with Amy and it's only now you are telling me that?" Stella asked outraged but before she could keep up her complaining Joe spoke up again.

"He just told us today," he informed her and looked suspiciously at his friend. "And why are you so interested in Nick's break-up with his girlfriend?"

Stella gave her another discrete glance (_a glance which wasn't so discrete because Macy was pretty sure that Kevin and Joe had seen it)_. "I'm just worried about Nick: He's my friend and I want to make sure that he's alright."

Somehow Stella, Joe and Kevin were now looking at Macy expecting her to say something: Macy knew she probably looked like a deer caught in the headlights as she tried to think of something… anything she could say that would make sense.

"I…" She began but couldn't say anything due to the bell ringing. "We should better hurry up." Macy said and made her way hurriedly to her first lesson without even looking back at her friends who were probably exchanging worried glances with each other.

¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤¸,ø¤

Macy had managed to avoid Stella, Kevin and Joe. She used softball-training as an excuse not to eat in the cafeteria with her friends and even managed to stay focused in her classes and she even managed not to think about Nick. But then again she was thinking about him now, so she wasn't as successful as she thought.

Now, she was on her way home where Stella would probably already be waiting for her to talk about Nick's break-up with Amy. Maybe she could stay here for a bit longer? Yes, she would do that. She would go to the atrium and sit there for a few moments and think about everything before she made her way home to talk with Stella.

Or maybe going to the atrium wasn't the best idea – especially not since Nick Lucas was already in atrium with his guitar on his lap and a far-away look on his face.

For a moment Macy thought about running away because the last three weeks she had worked hard on avoiding him and she didn't know if she could face him now. But before Macy could make up her mind Nick faced up from his guitar to look directly at Macy. Their eyes met and before Macy knew what she was doing she walked closer to the atrium, opened the door, stepped in it and sat beside Nick on the bench.

"Hey." It was Nick who spoke first.

"Hi." Macy replied.

Silence. If there was one thing that Macy hated, it was silence. Silence always made her feel small and worthless and caged.

"I'm sorry about… I'm sorry that it didn't work between you and Amy." She spoke to break the silence and she hoped that she didn't cross a line with her comment.

He looked at her with his deep-brown eyes and Macy wished that he wouldn't do that. "So you heard about our break-up?" He asked.

Macy nodded. "Kevin and Joe told us this morning."

"It didn't feel right anymore," Nick explained and Macy was surprised that he spoke about his break-up. Nick wasn't really the type to speak about such things. He was private and secretive.

"Oh." She said her eyes fixed on her shoes and immediately hit herself mentally because here she was listening to Nick and his break-up and all she could offer was an 'oh'.

"Everything was so much easier as a child, don't you think?" He asked his eyes on his guitar.

Startled, Macy looked up from her shoes. She wasn't sure what to say or what to do because Nick was definitely not himself today but before she could stop herself, Macy spoke, "I remember a time when everything was perfect, a time when I was just a little girl… a time when I was truly happy."

Surprised, Nick looked at her with an unreadable expression and Macy held her breath for any reaction but to her astonishment he just kept looking at her. It was unnerving.

"When you are a child, you think that the whole world waits for you to be discovered." She told him hoping that he would stop looking at her with his soulful-eyes. "There is nothing keeping you down… or up. You're-"

"… free." The youngest Lucas brother finished for her.

"Yes, free…" Macy nodded and somehow it was that moment that Macy decided that she didn't want to pretend anymore because she didn't have the strength to do that anymore. She wanted to be free.

"I am a horrible person," she blurted out and Nick's eyebrows rose in surprise and he opened his mouth to speak but Macy shock her head – a sign for him to be silent and listen. "I am a horrible person because when Joe told us that you broke with Amy, I was glad and a good person wouldn't feel glad that one of her friends broke with his girlfriend," Macy tried to smile. "A good person would console her friend and try to help him. A good person would keep pretending that everything is alright and that she didn't start to _like_ one of her friends. A good person would stop believing that she can fly if she only wished hard enough. I am a horrible person."

Macy stood up from the bench and if this had been a cliché scene from a cheesy love-movie, Nick would have grabbed her arm and held her back to confess his undying love for her. But Macy's life has never been like love-movie, so Macy hurried out of the atrium and the school-building without Nick holding her back.

Macy was sixteen when her heart broke for the first time.

--------------------

VI.

Macy was sixteen when she stopped pretending.

Macy didn't go to the school the next day. Her mother didn't ask any questions – the absence of her ever-present smile was probably explanation enough. So, Macy wasn't really surprised when Stella came by after school but she was more than surprised when Stella just followed her into her room and didn't say anything to her. The blonde stylist sat down next to Macy on her bed, still not saying anything. And before Macy knew what was happening, the tears began sliding down her cheeks and a pair of arms pulled her towards a soft chest. The brunette pressed her face into her friends shoulder.

"_Shhh, everything will be alright."_ Stella whispered over and over again and Macy just pressed her face harder into her shoulder hoping that the dull ache in her heart would lessen and that - magically - everything would be alright again.

¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤¸,ø¤

Macy didn't go to school the next day either – it was a Friday anyway. Stella came by after school again and stayed with her through the whole weekend. They just sat together and watched some old movies (_'Casablanca' had always been Macy's favorite). _Throughout the whole weekend Stella didn't ask any questions, didn't want to hear any explanation and Macy realized that Stella was the best friend a person could ask for.

And then Monday came and Macy was tempted to stay at home from another day but even Macy knew that she couldn't hide in her room forever. She was just glad that Stella volunteered to pick her up, so she didn't need to go to school alone. But that didn't mean that she wasn't nervous.

"You know," Stella began as she drove into a curve. "Nick won't come to school today."

Macy stopped playing with her hand nervously and looked at Stella in surprise, "What…?"

"He wasn't in school since…" Stella didn't finish the sentence. She didn't need to.

"He wasn't?" The lithe brunette asked again.

Stella nodded.

Macy shook her head trying to clear her thoughts. Nick didn't come to school and he won't be coming today? Macy definitely knew what she needed to do now.

"We have to go to the firehouse."

Stella tore her gaze away from the street. "What?"

"You heard me," Macy spoke stoically.

"Mace, I'm not sure if-" the blonde began but Macy cut her off.

"Please, Stella, I _need_ to go to the firehouse. Just drop me there and you can go to school. _Please."_

Stella let out a defeated sigh and maneuvered the car through the traffic towards the Lucas' firehouse all the while muttering about crazy friends she has to deal with.

Once the car stopped in front of the red building, Macy sprung out of the car, refused Stella's offer to come with her, practically ran towards the car and pressed the bell before she could change her own mind.

She waited for someone to open the door and felt like vomiting and fainting at the same time.

And then the door was opened and all thoughts of vomiting and fainting left her mind because there in front of her in grey sweat-pants, a white shirt and unkempt hair stood Nick Lucas.

"Macy?" He asked in open surprise. A surge of anger swept through her and Macy knew why she was here again.

"It's not fair!" Macy spoke. "I humiliated myself in front of you and I _deserved _to stay at home. And you," she poked him on his chest. "You… _jerk_… decide to stay away from school as well." She glared at him and continued, "It's not fair. It took all my courage to not stay at home today as well and then I hear from Stella that you won't come to school today. You are a coward!"

She closed her eyes for a moment, "Are you so afraid to face me?" Macy didn't wait for an answer, "You know what, you don't have to hide. I promise you that I'll avoid you. I won't stalk you. You don't have to see me. I managed to avoid you for three weeks, I can do it again. You can continue to live your merry life." Even in her own ears her voice sounded bitter and broken but Macy couldn't think about that right now. She was too busy looking at Nick's brown eyes that were stoically looking back at her.

Now that all of her anger had left her, Macy felt so unbelievably tired and drained and she just couldn't deal with this anymore. Love wasn't supposed to be so complicated, was it? She just wanted to go home and curl into her bed and stay there until she was thirty.

"I used to believe that the perfect girl for me would have blue eyes and light hair, so that the sun could bounce of off it," Nick began to speak and Macy looked at him in confusion. "She would love music as much as I do and of course, she would write her own songs. She would be intense and focused and realistic. She would be-"

"Everything I'm not." Macy finished quietly and something twisted painfully in her stomach.

Nick looked at her for a moment with an unreadable expression before nodding, "Everything you are not," He smiled sadly at the girl in front him. "I'm used to falling in love fast and hard. I'm used at hearing bells and see stars," he paused, "but then…" he trailed off.

He looked at her intensely as if he waited for her to do something but Macy was too busy to understand what was happening to react.

"I don't get you. I really try to understand you but when I think that I finally managed to _get _you… you just add another layer and you leave me confused. And you drive me crazy…" he stopped for a moment to look at her… to really look at her. "I don't think that I can take this anymore."

Then Nick leaned forward and even as their lips touched, a part of her mind was warning her that this was a very bad idea, but it was a very small part and it was coming from very far away. And then he started to pull away and she reacted without thought at all, leaning into him, her fingers in his hair clenching as she deepened the kiss, her blood soaring as he groaned against her mouth.

She tastes like cherries and vanilla… and broken dreams and Nick wondered how such a sweet girl can taste so sweet and bitter at the same time and he hoped that somehow he could mend all of her broken dreams.

Lemon and honey – that what he tastes like, Macy decided. Her daddy used to make her lemon tea with a spoonful of honey every time she felt bad.

They parted and Macy stared at him for a moment before lightly running her hand up the side of Nick's face and cupping his cheek in her palm. She ran her hand over the side of his face, her nails causing a slight tingling sensation in his skin. Nick took a deep breath, deeply affected by the oddly intimate gesture. He felt Macy run her hands through his hair as she cupped his face in her other hand.

Suddenly, Macy realized what she was doing and pulled her hand away from his face but before she could take it away completely Nick grabbed her hand.

"You shouldn't have done that," the petite brunette whispered brokenly and shook her head.

"Macy…" Nick began but Macy cut him short.

"I can't give you up now. You shouldn't have done that," she said again. She didn't want to be here anymore. She couldn't be here anymore. Macy turned away from Nick, trying to run away from him when she felt Nick's hand on her right arm.

Macy looked down at his hand that grasped her elbow.

"I want to help you fly," Nick spoke softly and Macy's eyes widened in surprise. "I'm not sure if you want my help. I don't know if I can help you or where we will go from here but I _like_ you and I want to see you fly."

Macy closed her eyes, trying to blink away the tears. She took a step forward, closing the small distance between Nick and herself and flung herself into his arms. The moment her body made contact with his, Nick wrapped his arms around her small body. She buried her face into his chest and before she knew what she was doing, Macy began to cry.

"Macy," Nick began as he realized that she was crying but Macy stopped him. Pulling away from him, she looked up and gave him a gentle, watery smile.

And that was all the encouragement Nick needed. Leaning down he pressed a soft kiss on her lips.

"I think, I'm finally flying," Macy whispered against his lips.

Nick smiled. "Good because I think, I'm flying too," he said before kissing her again.

Macy Misa was sixteen when she finally learned to fly.

_**Please, remember me  
Finally  
And all my**__** uphill clawing  
My dear  
But if I make  
The pearly gates  
Do my best to make a drawing  
Of God and Lucifer  
A boy and girl  
An angel kissing on a sinner  
A monkey and a man  
A marching band  
All around the frightened trapeze swingers**_

* * *

_Yes, I know the end is__ bad but I honestly couldn't come up with a better way to wrap up the story. Throughout writing the story inspiration left me and that's why the end is a bit rushed and cheesy. And I'm really, really bad at writing an end to stories. So yeah…_

_Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the story and I should better start working on the next chapter to 'Kismet Connection'._

_Thank you for reading!_


End file.
